Have you ever been teased by friends for having a “love brain”? Once in love, your world seems to instantly shrink down to include only your significant other. Nothing else seems important as your mind is filled with thoughts of them. If this sounds familiar, congratulations, you’ve officially joined the “love brain” club!
“Love brain” refers to a state of emotional immersion in a romantic relationship, often to the point of neglecting rational judgement. To put it simply, it’s when you become a bit “silly” in love, thinking only about your partner and completely disregarding everything else. In this state of mind, people often lose themselves in a sweet bubble and forget about real-life troubles and even their own needs.
For instance, you might find yourself making decisions you would never make outside of a romantic relationship. You could cancel hangouts with friends or even important work schedules just for a chance to see your partner. If you’re nodding while reading this, there’s no denying it, you’re a “love brain”!
The term “love brain” might sound negative, but is it a sweet bonus in a relationship or a potential minefield? In reality, “love brain” has its beautiful side, but it also has hidden traps. Let’s take a closer look!
The beauty of “love brain” lies in the sheer, unadulterated happiness it brings to those deep in the throes of love. You might do things that seem “silly,” but these acts often bring more joy to your life. For instance, you might spend an entire day running all over town to find your partner’s favorite limited-edition dessert as a surprise. Or, you might secretly plan a surprise trip to a place they casually mentioned wanting to visit, just for the thrill of seeing their excited reaction.
These seemingly “silly” actions are actually the sincerest expressions of love. “Love brain” can also stimulate your creativity, allowing you to reveal a side of you that doesn’t usually show. For example, you might suddenly become a poet to write a special love letter, even drawing illustrations on the paper. Or, you could make some unique gifts for your partner’s unforgettable birthday, things you would never usually do.
So, don’t resist these sweet feelings. Embrace your “love brain”! It can add color to your life and bring you unprecedented satisfaction in love.
However, “love brain” also has its blind spots. Immersed in the sweetness of love, you might find it hard to reject your partner’s unreasonable demands. For example, they might ask you to give up hangouts with friends to be with them or always cater to their preferences, ignoring your own needs.
If you constantly comply, you might find yourself gradually losing your identity. For instance, if your partner always expects you to adjust your plans for them, and you willingly oblige every time, they could get used to taking you for granted. You might start to feel that you’re always giving without getting anything in return. This could not only make you feel exhausted but also upset the balance in your relationship, leading to conflicts.
The downside of “love brain” is that it can make you overlook your own feelings and needs, as you revolve excessively around your partner. If this continues, it could not only affect your happiness but also damage the healthy development of your relationship.
So, how can you enjoy the sweetness of “love brain” without falling into its traps? The key lies in maintaining balance and always being mindful of your own feelings.
Firstly, whenever you’re making a decision, ask yourself: “Am I doing this because I truly want to, or because I feel I have to?” This question can help you determine whether you’re overly accommodating your partner or maintaining your own happiness and satisfaction.
Secondly, pay attention to your overall feelings in the relationship. If you start to feel exhausted, or feel like you’re always giving without getting equal return, it might be a signal that you need to adjust the balance of the relationship.
Thirdly, learning to say “no” is also important. If your partner’s demands make you uncomfortable or feel forced, don’t be afraid to express your feelings. A healthy relationship should be built on mutual respect and understanding. Setting boundaries not only won’t harm your relationship, but instead could make your partner respect you more, thereby strengthening your relationship.
Lastly, we highly recommend you to find that special someone on 2RedBeans who can both give you the sweet “love brain” experience and maintain a rational balance with you! There are many like-minded individuals on the platform waiting to establish a deep emotional connection with you. Good luck in finding your love, and don’t get lost in “love brain”!
If you find yourself trapped in “love brain,” feeling like you’re losing yourself in the relationship, here are some books that could help. They can not only assist you in better understanding yourself but also provide guidance on maintaining rationality in love.
“The Emotionally Abused Woman: Overcoming Destructive Patterns and Reclaiming Yourself” by Beverly Engel If you often feel emotionally drained in a relationship, this book provides practical tips to help you heal and rebuild your emotional health, avoiding the pitfalls of “love brain.”
“Emotional Vampires: Dealing with People Who Drain You Dry” by Albert J. Bernstein This book helps you identify and deal with “emotional vampires” who could make you lose yourself and drain you emotionally in a relationship, allowing you to maintain a clear mind and healthy boundaries.
“Loving Him without Losing You: How to Stop Disappearing and Start Being Yourself” by Beverly Engel This book teaches you how to maintain your true self in intimate relationships and avoid being overwhelmed by your partner’s needs and expectations. It provides concrete steps to help you find your own space and voice in love.
“Inner Bonding: Becoming a Loving Adult to Your Inner Child” by Margaret Paul This book encourages you to focus on personal growth in love, developing internal independence and self-worth. Through the guidance in this book, you can learn how to love others without neglecting your own needs.